Monday, September 24, 2012

"we encourage" - Blessed in Obedience

Hey, remember in my last post I said how crazy busy we are?
Obviously I was telling the truth because I haven't written a post in two weeks.

Things have been a bit of a whirlwind since school started and God has been showing me so much.
I want to clarify...
This post is not about keeping a perfect home, or perfect parenting or being a caring and attentive wife.
I feel completely ill equipped to talk to anyone about these topics.
What I CAN talk about is being blessed in obedience.

I'm a fresh start kind of girl.
Like, "when fall is here and school starts I'm going to have a whole new system for everything."
Or, "I'm going to come up with great ways to engage with the kids during everything we do together. This will resolve any conflict in the house."
That last one sounds absurd, but I'm pretty sure I have thought it.

I go through this scenario every year.
And every year I fairly quickly fail at it.

The hard truth is I'm not sure I have always had the right attitude about my role as "keeper of the home".
 Let me rephrase that.
I know I haven't always had the right attitude about my role as "keeper of the home."
I know we all have days when we feel that way. Or if you are a working mom, I'm sure you've had days when you wonder how or why you are doing everything you do.

But it was bigger than that.
I'm not sure I liked it overall. I've always felt it was the right thing FOR ME to be home. How much joy I was feeling in it is an entirely different story.
I think I was embarrassed to pray about my lack of joy in this area. As if somehow I was hiding that from God.
I have prayed many times for patience with my kids {can I get an amen?!}and for my relationship with my husband.
Recently it hit me.
I need more than that.
I needed specifics from God.
I don't say that as a demand.
I say it as an epiphany.
I need to ask God for specifically what I'm seeking.
I know my Father knows what I need before I even speak it.
But I also think by offering more detail into the requests I laid before Him, I was able to see the guidance He was placing before me better.
God is answering prayers all the time, but we don't always have eyes to see.

So this year when the Fall , start of the year frenzy hit me I prayed specifically for what I needed guidance in and surrendered my heart for this "job" I do everyday to God.
I asked Him to show me clear ways to keep a cleaner home. 
A routine that would keep me from feeling overwhelmed at the amount of cleaning that needs to happen with four kids and two dogs.
A more organized home to alleviate any of us rushing around trying to find things just before we run out the door. A better routine for the morning to keep mine and the kids stress level down so we can all start our day peacefully.
I asked Him to show me specific ways to better connect with my kids.
I asked Him to show me ways to bless my husband and make him feel loved.
Most importantly, I asked Him to give me joy in this thing I do everyday.
Being a wife and mother.
And as if it should surprise me, He is doing a mighty work.

No, this does not mean my house is spotless or that I flit around whistling while I scrub the toilets.
It does not mean my relationship with my kids is perfect and they constantly thank me for what a wonderful mother I am.
I definitely does not mean I never lose my temper.
And it does not mean my husband always feels like he is my priority, as he should be.

What it means is...
God has pointed me to some great resources and great ideas that have definitely enriched my time with the kids.
He has shown me ways of working around the house that work for me. Systems that help keep me from feeling like I'm drowning. And yes, sometimes I turn up the disco channel on Pandora and sing while I scrub the toilets.
He has helped me realize all of these things bless my husband. Although I still feel I have a lot of work to do in this area.
The more I am walking obedience, the more He blesses me.
I can truly say I am JOYFULLY fulfilling this role I feel He has called me to.
Is every moment a happy, peaceful one?
Is my home always clean and picked up?
Are my husband and kids complaint free?
I'm sure, no.
That's ok.
My heart is in a place of obedience. 
It's a difference I can feel, and a difference I think my family would say they notice.

I pray you all are finding joy in the roles you are fulfilling in your lives.
And if you aren't, can I suggest you give that over to God?
I promise it's worth it.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
John 10:10



hannah singer said...

so good, jami. grateful for you! xo

Lisa Lewis Koster said...

Amen! I've suddenly found myself back in parenting mode - caring for my 2 grandsons (2 months and 15 months) 4 days a week. This time around, I've asked God to help me be fully present as I care for them.

I'm so glad you were honest about how often you post. I'm having a hard time stringing a sentence together after watching babies all week!

Blessings to you! Come visit me at True Hope and a Future -

Rachel said...

Such a great post! And I'm linking up for the first time today! We don't have kids yet, but I do have a hubby and it's crazy how things can spiral into a mess and nobody feels important because life gets in the way. Such a great reminder to ask God to help us with all that, big and small. :)
Happy Tuesday!

karamurano said...

well, how funny is that, God has been speaking to me about the same thing! I've felt so convicted lately about the joy of keeping a home. the joy that we can make it on what my handworking husband makes. the joy of being able to spend moments with my baby that I will never get back. I have felt all of those things but my actions have not been lining up with those feelings. and now your blog (and well, Jesus) have kicked my butt into gear.

love you sista. can't wait to squeeze yo neck in a week!
peace out.

see how urban I am?! SNAP

Krista said...

Wonderful post! You have offered a fresh perspective to consider, thank you! Sometimes I feel like the thing I want or need must be so insignificant to God that I don't ask for help with it. I will try being specific in my prayer and trust that he will answer :)

Lora said...

i definitely can relate to your struggles, too! i so desire for my house to be a clutter-free, organized space. and so often, it is so far from it! i'd love to hear what systems have been working for you!

Anonymous said...

Thank you for reminding us to pray to God and be specific. Sometimes I think this is what I need to do. Blessings.

Lori said...

I love you dear one!

Flor said...

oh my goodness Jami, i feel as if I could have written this post myself.
for reals.
except for one thing... i've never really thought about praying and asking him about these "little" things (figure out routines, cleaning etc). I guess I always just thought that maybe it's so insignificant compared to the bigger issues I need help with..but then again, these "insignificant' issues weigh me down and cause me so much anxiety.. so I guess it's time to ask for His help, right? :I

Katy {and Kahler} said...

thanks for this! my husband and i work at a christian camp and we work 60-80 hours a week. i struggle with a lot of the same things you talked about- not feeling adequate as a wife/homemaker. I'm never home and the last thing i want to do when i get home is manage it. it makes me crazy because i have such a great desire to manage our home well, i just don't know how in this phase of life...

anyways. all that to say THANKS for sharing your heart in this post! :)

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